the glamorous life of a tooth fairy

12:30am
Zuzu: "Mommy, can I sleep in your bed?"
Mom: "No.  Now go back to sleep.  I love you..."

1:30am
Gage: "Mommy, I know you don't want to hear this right now, but the tooth fairy left me $20.00!"
Mom: turns on light
Gage: "Oh, it's only $10.00"
Mom: "That's so exciting, now go back to sleep. I love you..."
Gage: gets back in bed and finds previously overlooked note from tooth fairy
Mom: stands patiently with nightlight while Gage slowly reads the entire note
Gage: excitedly asks several very important questions about the tooth fairy (that Mom no longer retains)
Mom: "Now go back to sleep. I love you..."

2:00am
Gage:  "Mommy, I really need a drink"
Mom:  takes Gage to glass of water in bathroom
Gage: "And now I directly need to pee"
Mom: "Now go back to sleep.  I love you..."

2:30am
Gage: "Mommy, I just really need to keep drinking"
Mom: points from bed to remaining water on bathroom counter
Gage: polishes off glass
Mom: "Now go back to sleep.  I love you..."

3:15am
Zuzu: screaming from room, "Maaaammmmaaaaa"
Mom: ignores Zuzu in hopes that she's just having a nightmare
Zuzu: screaming from room, "Mommy!"
Mom: "What Zuzu?"
Zuzu: "I need help putting on my pajamas!"
Mom: schleps back down hallway for the fifth time in three hours wondering what the hell her daughter is talking about
Zuzu: sitting up in bed smiling, "Oh, I already have them on."
Mom: "Now go back to sleep.  I love you..."

7:30-8:30am
Detective Gage repeatedly attempts to destroy the myth of the tooth fairy.
Mom: "Now go to school.  I love you..."

look what's missing!

Nothing like a six year old being blatantly direct with the Tooth Fairy.

At least he said please.

sweet dreams

Zuzu has a very unsettling habit of screaming bloody murder in her sleep.  It doesn't really seem to bother her.  She never wakes up, she never remembers it in the morning and she never wants to talk about the subject.  Ever.  But, needless to say, the rest of the family is getting a little tired of the midnight, three AM and six AM wake-up calls.  So last night I made my first real attempt to stop the madness.

I started by asking what her bad dreams were about.  She told me there were mean monkeys in it that were trying to get us (thinking the wizard of oz might have something to do with this one).  I asked her how we could defeat the monkeys and then, in my sleepy stupor, I brilliantly suggest that we might acquire a gentle old elephant to scoop us up and carry us safely away from the mean monkeys. 

No, says our gentle three year old.  We need guns.

Guns?  Hmmmm.  Isn't there some other way we could make them go away, I ask.  Guns seem a little scary. 

Then fire, she says.  We'll set them on fire. 

Thinking fast I give in to the fire and suggest that we light the monkeys like birthday candles and then make a wish and blow them out.

She looks at me like I'm absolutely out of my mind and insists that we must not blow out the fire.  The monkeys must burn.

So with that I kiss her goodnight and leave the room.   And then our gentle child proceeds to sleep silently through the night. 

Burn monkeys, burn.

liar, liar pants on fire

Remember when I told you here that Gage had a loose tooth?  Yeah, well, I lied.  He actually has four loose teeth.  All four center teeth are wiggling.  Some more than others of course but the dentist advised that Gage learn the words to a new song this Spring.  It goes something like this, "All I want for Christmas is my two front teeth..." 

And while we're on the topic of misinformation...

Remember when I said I'd never buy Zuzu a Zhu Zhu pet?  Simply because she's a darling little girl and they are annoying battery operated RODENTS with the same name?  Well, I did say that.  A few times.  Even turned down a free one from a friend last fall.  Well, yesterday I caved.  I can't possibly explain why.  All I can say, in my defense, is that I held out FAR longer than I usually do.

Meet Jilly.  She's pink.  Next on the wish list is "Stinky".  Oh, and Gage would like "Captain Zhu".  Fortunately no one is interested in the one named "Zu Zu".  Yet.

all in the family

For the last ten minutes or so Zuzu has been swinging a gold charm in front of my face telling me to "go to sleep".  Then she gives me "true love's kiss" and I wake up.  It's really quite darling.  Especially since she's doing the entire thing in song.  Plus, I like the short naps.

Then she handed me the charm and said, "Here Mommy, you can advertise yourself now."

"I can hypnotize myself now or advertise myself now?"

"You can advertise yourself now."

posting for posterity

Hey, while we're at it, might as well post twice tonight.  You never know, you might not see me again for another month.

Gage was the "Fabulous First Grader" in his class last week.  All of the above documents were done by himself, with no prompting from mom.  And yes, he drew that self portrait at school.  Even I questioned that one.   Anyone surprised by his answer to, "Something I don't like is:"?  (Click on the picture, it gets big enough to read.)  

Also noteworthy is the answer to "When I grow up I think I'd like to:".  After reading his response out loud to me he remarked, "Because I know you won't let me be a football player".  Teach 'em young folks. Teach 'em young...

pardon the interruption

We interrupt a month's worth of silence for a very important announcement.

We have a loose tooth!!!

Being the youngest in his class Gage is the only one of his friends with all of his teeth.  It's been a long painful year of Gage shouting, "I have a loose tooth!" only to find that the tooth is rock solid.  But this week the moment finally arrived and the tooth is most definitely loose.

As you know, I rarely take "posed" pictures of the kids but today I forced Gage into a wide, tooth filled smile...as it may be one of the last.  And that kinda makes me cry.

The following shots of Zuzu have nothing to do with her teeth.  They were taken simply because she likes to pose.  And she's damn good at it.

friday photo diary

Ever wonder what happens when Zuzu's home from school, Mom feels like shit, the rain is (once again) coming down in buckets and the dog is confined to the house? Well, it goes something like this...

We start a band...

colorform fancy nancy gets super fancy...

Clifford is his name-o. I think this is as far as we got at this one...

Zuzu cheats her way through candy land. And is very proud of it...

Tiny hands find their way into the pile of "baby toys" set aside to be donated.  One of these days... 

We make a cake...

(even the dog is bored)

The three of us watch the birds through the window and wonder why in the world they are flying around in the pouring rain and strong winds...

Until we spy this...

We even get to play in the blinds.  We NEVER get to play in the blinds...

And Lucy occasionally takes her designated spot by the heat register...

Did you make it through the entire post? Looks thrilling, huh?  I actually think it took me longer to upload the photos and post them to blogger than we spent on the actual activities. 

And soon, we sleep. But not soon enough.

Happy Friday everyone...

for poppy, with love.

I just had one of those moments where you just want to laugh your head off but somehow it feels inappropriate.  So I'm going to share it with you and see how you react. 

We were setting up the wii when a PSA with Jennifer Aniston came on.  Both kids stopped to watch.  She was sitting with a little girl about Gage's age who has just recovered from cancer.  She is frail and has no hair.  Jennifer delivers a positive message and the little girl proudly talks about how she's the only girl on her t-ball team.  I break the silence and say something like, "Wow,  she's an athlete like you, Zuzu." 

To which Zuzu responds, "that's not a girl, that's a boy." 

Four big eyes look up at me.  OK, so they didn't get it.  Without giving them much detail I say, "No, honey that's a girl.  She was very sick and she had to take some medicine that made her hair fall out.  She's a very brave girl and she's going to be fine now.  Don't worry, nothing like that will ever happen to you but if it did you would be super brave too." 

To which Zuzu immediately responds, "Maybe Poppy taked that medicine and it made his hair fall off too."

mini photog

I just sat down at the kid's computer and stumbled upon these images in iphoto.  Modeled by Grandma and Mommy.  Styled and shot by Gage.  No cropping or retouching necessary.  Well, a butt lift might have been nice but I'm not that good an editor.

three's a cupcake

In a last ditch attempt to alleviate this...

But when the prospects of painting or puzzles just weren't enough, I resorted to the sure thing. Cupcakes. She made the batter and licked the spoons. I baked and frosted. She sprinkled...

The result? Two very happy boys...

One very happy girl...

And four dozen mini cupcakes. OK, we're down to about three dozen now but still. Anyone hungry?...

club penguin

We officially joined Club Penguin 30 days ago.  In all honesty, I'd been forcing the kids to play without the membership until Grandma arrived.  See, Grandmas typically give in a tad bit faster than Mommies.  If you are not familiar with Club Penguin, it's an online Disney enterprise.  An interactive penguin world where kids (and quite possibly some very bored adults) gather together.  Think the Sims in penguin suits. 

Each penguin gets his/her own igloo which you decorate to your comfort level (Gage got a disco floor today).  You also dress & accessorize your penguin.  Furniture & costumes are acquired by purchase with Club Penguin coins which you earn by playing games.  You can also buy *puffles* which are essentially pets.  You must monitor your pet to make sure it's had enough food, rest and energy or it just might run away.  Yup, they high tail it out if you don't take proper care of them.  Sadly, I think Gage is more attentive to his puffles needs than his actual dog's.

There is also a *special agent* feature.  Needless to say, Gage has been anxiously checking his membership for his special agent qualifying status every day since we joined.  Then miraculously yesterday it appeared. You would have thought that a Toys R Us with no cash registers flat out fell into our backyard.  The kid was hysterical with joy. 

"Mommy, I love you so much!" (it's ok, I'll take it when I can get it)
"This is my best day!" (really? damn.  I've failed)
"I feel like I'm famous!" (whatever works to build self-esteem, right?)

So Gage's special agent penguin is now permitted to enter the security headquarters and have access to a special agent phone.  He goes on special missions and has the unparalleled responsibility of monitoring the behavior of the other participating penguins.  So please, be careful what your children say while playing because he takes this very, very seriously.  I'm almost embarrassed for him.  But not.  Because secretly I know he's learning to read by anxiously watching all of the other penguins conversations.  At least that's what I continue to tell myself.

But lookout.  I fear his little sister just might hit secret agent status tomorrow. 

zuzuz

Um, yeah, there's one extra Z.  I gently explained that, although I simply adored her penmanship, she had an extra Z at the end that she might want to leave off next time.  Then, after rewriting "ZUZUZ" about 8 more times, she (not so gently) told me that she did it intentionally for her "last name".  I tried to explain that if she wants to denote her last name she should write "Zuzu D" but, being the opinionated 3 year old female that she is, she apparently prefers Z over D.  Can't say I blame her and certainly can't change her mind.  We'll practice D's tomorrow.  Nevertheless I'm a proud mama.  But what else is new?

zoo day

Well, as it turns out, every Bay Area resident boycotting *ski week* today went to the zoo instead. Fortunately we arrived early enough to acquire a front row parking spot and lunch table...and then managed somehow to mill around for say about SIX MORE HOURS during which time the six friends repeatedly asked if we could go to our house for a play date.  Um, we're at the zoo and you're having a blast...

We made our best gorilla faces...

We rode on the "ferris wheel" and Zuzu (our daredevil?) actually rode her own horse for the very first time.  That's her "Stop taking pictures and get back here right now, Mommy" look...

 

 We sat quietly and watched the animals (for a few brief moments)...

We were happy...

 

We were sad...

But mostly we just enjoyed a day off from school with our sweet friends...

 

  

 And the baby gorilla.  Oh, how we enjoyed the baby gorilla...