soak it up

You know that saying, "watch what you say"?
Well, clearly I'm not doing such a good job at that.

A month or so back Gage and I were talking about college as we were laying down to sleep.  Sure, he's only six but he likes to talk about these things, ok?  Finding myself a tad humorous at the moment, I spout out something like, "yeah, you're going to college...but Zuzu?  nah, she's going to jail."  She was there.  She didn't react much.  Gage and I laughed.  It was over.

Or so I thought.

Then, a few weeks later we're walking home from the park and Gage is on one of his *I don't want to grow up* kicks.  Out of nowhere he announces that he does not want to go to college.  At which time Zuzu follows, rather nervously with, "and I don't want to go to jail!"

Honestly, I had no idea where she got that from.  I walked a bit in silence racking my brain to figure out where that came from when BOOM.  I found it. 

Oops.

I explained that no, she wasn't ever going to jail and that mommy had just been joking.  Zuzu, in fact, would go to college just like her brother.  Done?

Nope.

Tonight as we're getting ready for bed the subject of college comes up again.  Zuzu turns to her Grandma and asks, "is college like jail?"

Imagine Grandma's surprise.

truth be told

Well, here we go again. Santa has retreated back to the North Pole so the Tooth Fairy has consumed us.

Gage asked me the other night whether or not she was real. (Of course he prefaced the question with something like, "I know you're not going to want to hear this but...") I paused for a moment trying to figure out how to respond. Then he hits me with, "C'mom mom, all my friends at school are dying to know. We talk about it all the time. We don't think she's real but we don't know for sure. Can't you just give us the answer please?"

Us? So now the entire CLASS is depending on me? Great.

***oh my goodness.  a trailer for a movie called "tooth fairy" just came on my television.  swear.  just now.  too weird.***

Where did I leave off?  Oh yeah.  Resentment.  Truly, I'm a little resentful to whomever came up with all these fictitious individuals. Did they realize that they would be forcing parents everywhere to LIE to their children?  I will not lie.  I can not lie.  But I didn't tell the truth either.  Not gonna be that mom.  Gage will have to retreat back to school and profess to his cronies that he has the world's vaguest mother ever.


*image courtesy of the doodle girl

antique

A about a week or so ago Zuzu lovingly announced that I was "antique".  I'm thinking she heard the word on Martha Speaks although I'm also thinking she may be confusing it with the word "unique". This morning she wanted to know what "antique", "magnificent", "anxious" and "irritated" meant.  I'm not sure what the relationship between these words is, unless she believes they all define me, but she was especially concerned about antique.

This afternoon we went mini golfing with some friends. This has absolutely nothing to do with Zuzu's new vocabulary obsession other than the fact that these photos looked especially yummy when I "antiqued" them. And so we have a blog post.  I think.

sleep talkin' man

"Oompa loompas don't sing in heaven. They tidy up the clouds."
"My vision of hell is a lentil casserole."
"Vegetarians will be the first to go. That's my plan. Vegans haven't got a hope. 'I eat air, I'm so healthy...' Bollocks!"
"Don't leave the duck there. It's totally irresponsible. Put it on the swing, it'll have much more fun."
"I've got a badger, a dog, a cat, and a sack. Now that I've got 'em you can fuck off. All mine."

While Gage DOES talk in his sleep he is not quite this creative.  These are the sleep talking words of a Brit named Adam who is apparently quite a conservative gent when he is not sleeping.  His wife, in an attempt to reap some reward from her many sleepless nights, has begun to document his adventures in dreamland.  The blog is called Sleep Talkin' Man and it is absolutely side splitting hysterical.   R Rated.  But hysterical.  And they just launched a line of t-shirts too.

petite photog

The new year brought a clear realization that I must get a handle on the now 13,500 photos saved on my computer (yes, that's after an hour of editing down last Wednesday), the year and a half worth of photos that have yet to be digitally archived, and the year of prints that still have yet to be ordered and stored (and yes, that's after the six months worth that were appropriated to their albums last week). And YES, I still put photos in albums. Shoot me for being traditional like that.

Anyway, if you know me you will realize that this lack of order literally keeps me up at night. The fact that I am making small progress is good, but only exemplifies how far I still have to go.

And, alas, the new year brought us something else. A new camera. No, not mine. I have enough thank you very much. This new camera belongs to Gage. He's six. And he loves everything about it. Must run in the blood. The photos above are some of my favorites of his from the past week. I have altered the color on a few just slightly but no cropping or editing has been done beyond that.

The last photo of Zuzu on the bike was taken from a tree while she was moving.

So now I must stop blogging and get to work making room on my computer for what's to come. And somehow that makes it almost fun. Almost.

And did I mention that his camera shoots video too....?

fort gage

My first thought: damn, Gage has far too many legos

My next thought: but look at how creative we were. Our new fort has two working doors & a window. The kids are ecstatic and it was FREE!

My next thought: free? Those boxes must have cost about a grand... and where am I going to put this thing when the novelty wears off?

My final thought: damn, Gage has far too many legos

snow bunny

No reason, really. Just couldn't resist archiving this photo of Zuzu experiencing snow for the very first time. Talk about pretty in pink.

dear grandparents,

Happy New Year!
This is just a little insight into what your grandchildren have been up to during the two long weeks since I last posted here...

1. Zuzu is learning to swim. We are four weeks in and the instructor is still focusing mainly on lifesaving skills...like what to do if she ever falls in the water and needs help. Unfortunately, he doesn't realize that our children follow directions SO WELL that her screaming "Mommy" is all part of the act...


2. After a week at Grandma's Art Studio, Gage is still creating like mad.


3. Lucy is officially out of her mind and can now be accepted fully into the family.


4. Gage has an idea for yet another journal he would like to keep. This one is called his "curious book". In it he will write down all the questions that he wants answered (and that mom couldn't seem to answer without the help of her trusty friend Ms. Google and/or secretly just doesn't want to answer for fear of nightmares). Original entries will include: why can't you SEE the water evaporating into the sky? and who created halloween...and why?

5. And while we're on the subject of nightmares, when asked by the homeopath today how often Gage has nightmares his answer was, "not too much, I mean, about as much as I have goodmares".

6. And while we're coining new phrases, when trying to explain to Zuzu that Christmas happens everywhere, not JUST at her Grandma's house as she previously believed, she challenged me like this:

do they have Christmas in California?
yes, zuzu, they have Christmas in California.
do they have Christmas in San Francisco?
yes, zuzu, they have Christmas in San Francisco.
do they have Christmas in your-ami? (that would be my-ami)
(chuckle)
yes, zuzu, they have Christmas in your-ami.
do they have Christmas in our-ami?
yes, zuzu, they have Christmas in our-ami too.

merry christmas to all...

...and to all, a good night!

might as well jump

Just because she's cute. And because these were the last photos taken in the jumpy before the kids completely annihilated it. Cause this is what every parent allows their children to do in a jumpy...right?

getting lucky

If you look closely at the YouTube screen on the computer you might see that this Alvin & the Chipmunks tune is called "Getting Lucky". Zuzu, however, prefers to sing "get nugget with you" instead. Because that makes perfect sense.

do you see what I see?

Yesterday began our winter vacation. The point at which the driver got lost trying to avoid a major traffic pile up on the way to the airport began my first migraine of the trip. Me + two kids + rush to airport + migraine = not good.

As we're standing in line at Peet's trying to get mom some water to pop her meds & some apple juice to calm the thirsty children a woman approaches. It's really all a blur now but for some reason I felt the need to tell her about my migraine, and then we raced to the bathrooms. We came across her again near the gate and she asks kindly,

"Are you going to Vegas?"

"No." I reply. "We're headed to Ft. Lauderdale."

Then she explains, "Oh, because I'm a mind-reader and I know what you're going through right now and I can tell it's tough. I was going to offer to help you."

I thank her efforts gratefully and head towards our now boarding flight.

Once the meds kick in and I'm able to relax a little I start to think about the encounter a little more and I wonder. If she was a mind-reader then you'd think she would have known we weren't going to Vegas, right? I mean there were only two planes leaving from that area. Vegas & Ft. Lauderdale. I'm a mom alone with two little kids. You're not a mind-reader, right? Which flight would you guess we were on? Still, I suppose I can't knock her for trying.

wordless wednesday

All zuzu...all the time...
Seriously though, you probably shouldn't watch this unless you already know and love zu cause it's kinda long & pretty darn repetitive. But the grandparents will like it. And that's what really matters tonight, right? (oops. that wasn't all that wordless now was it?)

oh christmas tree...

I caved. It's not that I'm a scrooge. Ok, maybe I am just a little bit. But mostly it's that we don't spend Christmas day here...so why do we need a tree? There are no presents to put under it. And they are messy. And it's just one more thing to remember to feed!

But this year the kids have been begging to decorate the house. Begging. And their definition of "decorate" is not quite as refined as mine. So, I caved. But heck if I was going to go easily. I was going to make this FUN. We were not just going to trim a tree. We were going to "decorate" it.

So, while kids were unsuspectingly catching a flick about aliens I did this...


And they came home to this...


It was 7:00 at night but there was no arguing with them. We had to start the decorating at ONCE. There would be no waiting for tomorrow. Not even a discussion about it. So we whipped open the glue, and the glitter (oh, so much glitter), the pipe cleaners, the beads, the bells, the pom poms, the ribbon, and the $.29 make-shift ornaments and we went to town...


Now if I was the type of person that desired full control over a situation this one would have made me very uncomfortable. (sarcasm included) These kids were hell bent on doing all the decorating themselves. (Is it ok that I said hell in a Christmas tree post?) So, I let them. Well, sort of. I definitely snuck up a few times to twist zuzu's pipe cleaners a little more tightly around the branches. But two nights later, Zu is STILL adding decorations to the tree. They have created quite a masterpiece.

They started with the little white berries...


They strung beads & bells on ribbon & pipe cleaners...


And then there were the glitter ornaments. (Note to self: do not initiate glitter ornament project with two anxious children the day AFTER the house has been cleaned unless you really, really love glitter).

There are snowmen & stars...



angels & hearts...



beads & bells...



and, of course, a little gold star on top.


I'll post a picture of the entire tree when it's all said and done. But we've got a few hundred beads left...and the tree is fake and not apt to die on us any time soon...so it could be a while...

the evolution of lucy

Happy 1st Birthday sweet girl.
We are so glad you are part of our family.
Even if you will never, ever be able to read this.

catch my tune

Last night was not unlike most for moms like me. You know, stay up too late trying to catch up. Then you finally drag yourself to bed when you realize the date has changed only to get sucked in (pardon the pun) by the latest Edward Cullen adventure.

The kids were up late, you rationalize. They'll sleep in...there's no school tomorrow...I've got a good six hours coming to me. Famous last thoughts. Number two had a nightmare, number one got thirsty, number two crawled in the big bed and then proceeded to scream random thoughts in her sleep at a pitch I'm surprised didn't wake the neighbors. "Strawberry Shortcake!" "I want chocolate milk!" Random. Annoying.

So, needless to say, I'm laying there wide awake at 3:00am, exhausted and longing for sleep but wait, it gets better. I cannot sleep. All I can do is sing this song in my head. Over and over and over again. So I figured the best thing I could do tonight, as I struggle to keep my head squarely over my neck, was share the pain. Cause guess what? They didn't sleep in. Not even close. But somewhere, I'm sure of it, there's a Party in the USA.

the girl in the mirror

Do most children sit and taunt themselves in the mirror like mine and exactly what does this say about her? No smiles, no silly faces, no admiration. She stood there for several long minutes and stuck her tongue out at herself. Then she just silently stared herself down..

facing the facts

I've been contending with problem skin for most of my adult life. I do a great job hiding my stress and frustration but unfortunately, my face does not. I've got the best esthetician, the best dermatologist & a newly acquired homeopath that I am crossing fingers will be the best as well since my last one up and ran away. Anyway, point is, I'm doing all I really can. But there are always people that want to help... because what worked for them will definitely work for me. Yeah, not so much. Trust me. And bless their hearts it's for the right reasons but sometimes I just can't help but giggle.

My sweet friend Mary is an acupuncturist and she provided me with a great worksheet with all types of natural remedies ranging from rubbing watermelon rind, yogurt and/or raspberries on my face to drinking dandelion and beet top or carrot top tea. Yuuummm. Then, at the bottom of the sheet there is a brief list of foods to avoid. And this, my friends, is when the real belly laugh happened...

"fried foods, fatty foods, spicy foods, oily foods, coffee, alcohol, sugar, smoking, stress, constipation, make-up, washing with chemicals or soap, chocolate, ice cream, soft drinks, dairy foods, emotional stress, red meat, shellfish, bamboo shoots, white mushrooms"

Shit. I guess better cut down on those damn bamboo shoots.

new moon and a trundle bed

Can someone please explain why my dear son is the one who is afraid to sleep in his room when it is I that goes to bed with visions of vampires & werewolves in my head? (Yes, I managed to complete New Moon last night, just in time for the release of the movie at midnight tonight...which I will probably never see...certainly not at midnight tonight...but that's not really the point. Or is it?)

Back to the boy. So, did you happen to catch my last post? Yes, that one about how I journeyed out to the East Bay over the mile long white knuckle bridge, schlepped through the township that is Ikea, loaded a desk and drawers onto my cart (no easy feat when there are no locks on the wheels) AND managed to assemble the damn thing before the sun went down. Well guess where the snores are coming from tonight? Um, yeah. Two nights in his own room and he's back in his sister's trundle. Go figure.

I was too tired to put up much of a fight.
"But Gage, what about your new grown up room?"
"Well I still like to play in it but I just don't want to sleep in it yet."

Great.

He wants a bunk bed. I've got a few hours to assemble one tomorrow between ballet & school pick-up. Whatcha think?

Kidding.

I think.

in my room...

I'm not sure exactly when it happened. Or why even. But one day, not so long ago, Gage became terrified of his room. He started asking me to pick out his clothes and then he started sleeping in his little sister's trundle bed. I never really argued or questioned it. (Heck, him sleeping in his sister's room actually made her stay in bed all night rather than running to me at 4am.) The sad thing was, really, that Gage has the best room in the house. His sister's room is a shoebox next to his so why was it sitting there virtually unused... and what could I do about it?

We talked about it occasionally but still, I never pushed. Then, when the time was right, I made an offer. A desk. Any desk he wanted. (See, this killed two big fat crows with one itty bitty stone because the desk would also serve to relieve the constantly growing piles of books & journals overtaking the dining room table). He seemed to like the idea so I ran with it.

I printed a half a dozen tear sheets from various websites with prices ranging from $107 to over a grand. I put them in front of him. He chose the $107 desk. We were on a roll!

I hightailed it to Ikea this morning and purchased the desk, complete with a swivel chair, book holders, picture frame & lamp. I thought he was going to be over the moon when he came home from school and saw the boxes. Yeah, not so much. The Nintendo was pretty enticing though.

Fast forward five hours. It's bed time and I can't get him to leave the desk. He is in his room ALONE writing math problems in a sketch book. Everything is arranged perfectly. He has already organized four of the five drawers and he has grand ideas for how he will use the new environment. He even asked to sleep in his own bed tonight. Would have worked too if the dog hadn't peed in it moments earlier. So he said goodnight to the desk (yes, he really did) and headed once again to his sister's trundle with visions of homework dancing in his head.

Now I sit here wondering what to do when Zuzu asks to sleep in Gage's room tomorrow night or where in the world the desk will go in her little shoebox...